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Haris & Joy
Adoption is one of the best gifts we will ever receive in our lives. There is no greater blessing than having the opportunity love and raise a child, to be a Mom and Dad. We have dreamed and hoped for this day. Thank you for taking the time to learn more about us! We cannot wait to continue this journey together!
Our Family Dream
We cannot wait to start sharing our life with this child! Our number one dream is for our child to grow up loved and happy. To have the opportunity to pursue what they are passionate about in life, regardless if the idea is practical. Happiness is everything. Life is too short to do things you do not enjoy. We look forward to sharing our current traditions with him/her and starting new ones as well. We want to share with them the things we are passionate about: family road trips, Disney World, camping, hiking, sports, cars, video games and more. However, we are sure to keep both eyes open and understand that even though we might love these activities, our child has to find their own passions in life. They might even introduce us to new activities and traditions. Most importantly we must always be there for one another. That is what family is all about.
Our Favorite Vacation Spot
If we have to choose one place it would be Disney World in Florida. I have been visiting Disney since I was around the age of six. In 2007 my parent's became a part of the Disney Vacation Club (basically a timeshare program), which meant we could visit Disney World every year. Two years ago they gifted their membership to be split between me and my brothers. This year I have three Disney trips planned (yes, I know how VERY blessed I am!). In May I will be going with my Mom and my nephew who is five for their flower and garden show. We wanted to take him together before he starts school in the fall. In October my husband and I are taking his sister and her two kids for the first time. I cannot wait! They are so excited!!! There is nothing like watching a person see Disney for the first time. Plus, Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party is our FAVE!!!! Then, in December my Mom and I will take a mother daughter trip one more time before our annual pass expires. We plan on skipping Disney in 2020 with the hopes that we will be caring for a new baby instead. However, I cannot wait to introduce him/her to Disney and all the magic it brings in the years to come!!!
Our Family Traditions
Road trips have kind of become a thing in our family over the years. As a child, Joy's mom was always taking Joy and her brothers to new places. Sometimes they took day trips and other times they took the camper to explore states away. Joy remembers exploring places like Boston, Salem, Mackinaw Island and so much more. There is so much culture and history in the US! As an adult, Joy still takes road trips with her mom. Last year Joy and her mom drove down to Waco, Texas to visit all things Chip and JoJo. Their next road trip will span a few weeks to the Northwest portions of the U.S. Joy and her mom plan on visiting lots of historic landmarks as well as Seattle down to California. They plan on waiting a few years though so they can bring the little one on the adventure, too!
We also love to take road trips as a couple. Haris LOVES to drive, so whenever we get a chance we hop in the car and spend a day exploring new cities around us. If we have the time off from work, we will hook up the camper and travel a little farther. Road trips together are Joy's favorite. It's a great way for us to bond without the intrusion of technology.
Our House and Neighborhood
Our home has been in Joy's family for 29 years. It was built by her parent's in 1990. They chose this town for the excellent school district and safe neighborhoods. On nice days, a neighbor puts out a neon yellow safety man at the end of the cul-de-sac to remind drivers to slow down as the children play in the street. A two-minute walk away is Friendship Park, where kids can play on the playground or dig in the sand. The town center is only a few miles away. In the summer there are free concerts in the park along with other specialized family day events.
Closer to home, in our backyard is a huge pool that gets used frequently on hot summer days. Flower gardens with trees line the perimeter of the yard and a small swing set is tucked neatly under a large birch tree. Inside, the kitchen joins directly into the family room, making it easy to keep children in sight (our most used rooms in the house). Joy's home office is just around the corner from there and downstairs in the basement Haris also works from home in his man cave setting.
However, our favorite space to spend time is in our backyard with the pool, grass to run and play, evening campfires and enough seating for 19 people. Lots of special memories have happened there: our wedding shower, birthday gatherings, memorial day barbecues and more!
Our Extended Families
We are very close with both sides of our family. Birthday celebrations have always been a big deal in Joy's family. On each person's birthday the house is decorated with signs and balloons. The birthday person picks out a homemade meal for their day as well as a game to play as a family. On Halloween we trick-or-treat around our neighborhood together. We pull a wagon with a small speaker playing the "Mickey's Boo to You" parade song on repeat. The Fourth of July is a full day event, beginning with the parade in the morning, followed by swimming in our pool and then card games at the town center while we eat ice cream, listen to live bands and wait for the fireworks.
One of the things that makes our family special is the fact that both sides of our family get along so well. We have each other's back. No matter what. If we ever needed anything we know they would be there for us. Our families have been incredibly supportive through our fertility struggles and now our adoption process.
From Us to You
Thank you. To consider placing a child for adoption must be harder that we could possibly imagine. It's taken us months to write this letter because of that. What could we possibly write to express not only our gratitude, but our appreciation for your sacrifice? We don't know if there are truly words that can express what our hearts feel, but we will try our best.
For as long as Joy can remember, she's wanted to be a mom. It was never really an option not to be in her mind. So, once we were married, we began trying to start our family immediately. Unfortunately, life doesn't always go as planned. After a year of trying naturally, 3-4 years of fertility attempts and one brief moment of hope when Joy finally became pregnant and then lost the baby, we decided that the best way for our family to grow was through adoption.
We met April 20, 2012 at the first wedding Joy ever photographed. Haris was the best man and the bride happened to be Joy's brother's long time ex-girlfriend (so she knew her very well). The short version of the story is Haris "stalked" Joy all day. Everyone in the bridal party knew Haris was crushing on Joy, including the bride and groom. Joy was clueless. Finally, by the end of the night, Joy was let in on the "secret" and agreed to stay for one drink. Later that evening Joy messaged Haris on Facebook and from there we planned our first date. It was a lot of phone chats the first few months since Joy was living a few states away, but later that summer Joy spent six weeks at home. We were inseparable. A couple months later Haris moved to be with Joy. The following year we got engaged and were married on May 16, 2014. We just celebrated our five year anniversary. Like any marriage, we have our occasional bumps, but we are very good at being honest with each other and with that honesty comes growth.
All a parent wants is for their child to live a happy life and be loved. At least, that's what we imagine a parent would want. One of our biggest strengths is that the child will be very loved and supported, not just by us, but by all around us. Both of our families are a tight nit group. We support each other, help each other and love spending time together. It's so wonderful being surrounded by so much family. Our family is our tribe; the people we choose to hang out with most often. We cannot wait to share all that love with our baby—to bring them to the Fourth of July parade, go trick-or-treating around the neighborhood, enjoy camping trips with family, trips to Disney World, swim in our pool, walk them to school and so much more.
A child can never have too much love. We want you to be in their life in some capacity, if that's something you want. It's important to not only learn about our families customs and traditions, but where they came from. We can decide together what is the best path for us all. We don't believe there is a right or wrong way, but it has to be a decision we all feel comfortable with. Whether we communicate through snail mail, email, phone or have future visits, we will always have photos to share documenting their life. (One of the perks of Joy being a professional photographer!) We cannot wait to start documenting our baby's life!
Our many thanks for allowing our family to grow!
Haris & Joy
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